When ever I wanted to get my dick sucked, old Mark was always around. any way, Mark would get up and go into his bedroom and take off his pands and jockey shorts and that was my signal to follow him and take my pants and boxers off and lie down on the bed, he continued to masturbate his big old cock, but it never really got hard, but he tried, and wold start giving me head and he wold suck it, then stop to suck on my balls. he would try kiss me, but i always turned my head away. but he just kept sucking my cock until i came in his mouth and swallowed it all then lick me clean. i kinda felt sorry for him so i started to jack him off, but he wanted me to suck his cock, i told him i would just jack him off until he came, but he never did cum.A couple of times i would fall a sleep on his bed and he tried to fuck me, but i wasn't having any of that. This went on and off for about ten years, i always went home happy and my pocket with ten or twenty dollars. i would visit him every. What if someone reads this? What if Nick reads this? Holy crap, Nick, are you reading this, baby? I can picture it so clearly; I left this thing lying open, or you went looking in my drawer for my keys, or any one of a million other things that could put this in your hands. Maybe I got killed at work and you’re sifting through my stuff, trying to make sense of the insensible, and this is what you find! Now I feel like an utter turd; part of me wants to tear out this page and burn the fucking thing. But I have to go on. I have to. Nick, baby, if you are reading this then please keep an open mind. Know that I love you. Always have, always will. Nothing has changed there. But there is something new; something inside me that I have to deal with and it doesn’t affect the way I love you. I’m not trying to make something happen with Susan, but if it did – and I know you probably won’t believe this – then it might actually be good for me. For us. I feel that very strongly.~~~ Damn, clock’s.
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